“Many people hear voices when no-one is there. Some of them are called mad and are shut up in rooms where they stare at the walls all day. Others are called writers and they do pretty much the same thing.”
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((((((First off and for most I would like to make an announcement that I have my first subscriber! *Insert fan-girl squeals and hopping up and down here* You know who you are and thank-you soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…..(Three hours later)…ooooooooooooooo much! (take big gasp of breath) Now back to you normally scheduled programming.))))))
Hello again blog. Long time no see (or write). I have come to the conclusion that my mind is total mush. All ability to think those analytical type of thought has flown out the window with the sixty + miles-per-hour wind that has recently flooded my home city/town/place. Which I suppose, for the purpose of Spring Break, is fine…. But I start back at school tomorrow and am not sure how well all this is actually going to work out. So here’s to giving my friends a little enjoyment at watching my unthinkingness (It’s a word now :p)
Spring break. The phrase brings about a yearning picture of sun, beaches, swimming, ect. One of many breaks that the school children find themselves unconsciously counting down the days for; spring fever runs amuck attacking every soul who dares to hope for a small relief of their ordinary school-week schedule. And though no matter how much we over think the wondrous, dare I say magical, possibilities of this week, we are almost always let down. Now as I find myself curled up in this stupidly broken recliner, tapping out my thoughts onto this keyboard, and glowering out of my large living-room window at the two inches of fresh snow that have recently drifted down from the heavens, I have that terrible sinking feeling that there will be many more breaks just like this one. And I have forced myself once again to vow never to string such high expectations on a silly little week again… I will fail at this though. I, as most of us do, know the great pleasure that comes from “Planning” out how my mini-vacation will come about. Saying this I have no doubt that come next break my imagination’s hand crank will begin to turn on autopilot as the mystical opportunities stretch before its eyes with child-like wonder.
Now if you have ever read one of my other posts, you would know that the quotes up top generally set off the tone of the entire ‘article’. Well what I was referring to my amazingly super-unstoppable *~*“Writer’s Block”*~* (Insert chilling music here: dun dun dun dun…..) *audience gasp, filled with fear for their own creative outlet* My ode to this retarded road bump began early last Saturday and has not failed to hold steady until…. Today. *Sighs* a whole week wasted. Or so I thought. But in retrospect I can see how helpful this little nuisance was, for in my ingenious attempts to thwart *~*his*~* dastardly leachyness (Again my word: I don’t care about grammar at the moment) I did many a thing that would not have been possible had I been chained to my laptop all week. I cooked, cleaned, did a LOT of yoga, walked/ran on my treadmill, played with my dog, hopelessly stalked the Nano forums (both YWP{Young writers program} and regular), read, watched movies, discovered how to fix green tea that that it doesn’t taste like an herb filled water (Just add milk) listened to endless amounts of music, created a family tree for my MC(Main Character) in my Nano Novel, and gave my *~*Story Dreamer*~* much to think about. So all and all my week was… okay.
One thing that I have learned from all of this is what should be a written rule somewhere Thou shall not cook whilst thy mind is mush.(Unless of course it’s three A.M) It’s a good general rule to live by.(Switch to third person)
At first she started simple, warm up some leftovers she thought to herself. Easy enough for any fool… or at least that’s what she tried to convince herself. The sad truth was that poor Rose was not just any fool. When attempting to remove the bowl of food from the microwave, she found herself ‘forgetting’ that the dish would be hot causing her to reach in, grab it and promptly drop it to the floor. This action sent her into a spiraling furry of a race to trap her and her brother’s dogs into the master bedroom in hopes of stopping their quest to eat and get the porcelain stuck into every cranny of their paws. At the same time she went into robotic motions as she scooped, swept, and mopped the floor surrounding the crime scene, all before the pups had opportunity to go ‘potty’ all over the nice hardwood floors. Rose succeeded, but just barely; and after this ordeal she surrendered to the skipping of that meal.
The next day at the strike of noon (or shortly thereafter) Rose found herself looking at another strikingly simple task; cook canned chili. After opening the can and dumping the contents into a small metal pan over a medium-high stovetop heat, the beautiful hypnotizing procrastination powers of The YWP Nano forums sucked her in, erasing every thought of watching and stirring the cooking goop…. That is until she smelt the putrid aroma of burned chili smoke and caked on charcoaled chili. Rose was forced to start over. Following shortly after came the idea to make boxed brownies for her sister and parents who had taken advantage of the break to go gallivanting to who knows where in the country while she stayed at home taking care of the house and dog. After they were ready and cooled, Rose covered the pan with foil and place it in the microwave for ‘safe keeping.’ Promptly after this, her brother (who had recently moved back into some house around the Rose’s town) with his radar for baked-goods came stomping into her house. He slammed open the microwave door and continued to devour the entire 9 x 9 pan within the hour and without any further thought of who they were truly meant for.
Later that night (Or technically the next morning for it was near two A.m) due to her usual insomniatic habits, Rose decided to put in one last desperate attempt to cook her family (Not her bro) a welcome home gifts. By four in the morning the Magic Cookie Bars were prepared, cooked, cooled, and covered and Rose found herself warmly wrapped in the blankets of her bed.
The next morning Rose brings the 13×9 pan of Marshmallow-coconut-semi-sweet-and-white-chocolate-grahamcrackery-goodness to her room, placing it on her bed (the only available spot to put it) and shutting the door ‘securely’ behind her. Little did she know (remember) her door was unable to latch properly. Her dog on the other hand did, and he scratched it open and consumed the entire pan. (end of third person story) As you can tell, I wasn’t having much luck with the kitchen.
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The above symbols appeared in the text referring to my personification of my Inner Editor, Spell checker, Story Dreamer, and Writer’s block.
• My Inner Editor is a guy named Tom. He has chocolate brown medium length (for a guy) hair, always wears a black suit, white dress suit red tie and really shiny black suit, has jade green eyes, wears black Clark Kent style glasses, is twenty seven and always has coffee in a white china mug. Sometimes he gets really annoying, but I love and couldn’t live without his help.
• My Story Dreamer is amazing. She has shiny pitch black straight hair that has rainbow tips, bangs and is shoulder length. She is short to the extreme, loves wearing all kinds of wacky clothes, especially dresses, always has on these shiny bright red heals, always has on a crescent moon shaped pendent necklace, and is completely covered in glitter. Oh, and her eyes are rainbow too.
• My Spell Checker is a slacker, and has not appeared for five years. I think he’s lost, gone completely MIA , and I can’t seem to remember what he looks like.
• My Writers block is an evil dark greenish-black tar-like creature that leaches on to my head and scrambles my brain, making it nearly impossible to write a word.
And that’s all for now. So until the next post Keep On Dreaming &*)