The most sacred place dwells within our heart, where dreams are born and secrets sleep, a mystical refuge of darkness and light, fear and conquest, adventure and discovery, challenge and transformation. Our heart speaks for our soul every moment while we are alive. Listen… as the whispering beat repeats: be…gin, be…gin, be…gin. It’s really that simple. Just begin… again.
Royce Addington 


I come to you, dear readers, if there are any of you left, to begin once again this process of blogging. I’m a terrible blogger, I know. For a while there I was doing so well, and there were so many stories I would have loved to share with the world. Trust me, I’m in desperate need of a venting resource. So why did I cease my awesome blogging streak back in June?  Well my computer died.

Rest In Peace little darling.

How did this tragic turn of events occur? What can I say, I am a serial technology killer. Seriously. Anything that even remotely revolves around technology might as well be granted a death certificate when it first touches my hands. My computer? Well, it lost the ability to eat power. If it was just the charger, I would have been back a lot sooner. No, it’s anorexic ways were not caused from a faulty power source, but from the area where said power was consumed. In other words, it was shot.

Hope was not fully lost however, for my beautiful Virus Trap laid in waiting, ready to be of service. Great, right? Wrong.  The lovely contraption was fraught with chronic Narcolepsy. It fell asleep/died literally every five minutes. As you can imagine, after about the fifth time of restarting the thing in a thirty minute period, one begins to become overly irritated. Not precisely a great tool for writing. Not to mention it’s utter hate for youtube, Microsoft Word, and basically every website and program that I enjoy. Needless to say, the situation needed correction.

And correction it got… after over two months of work with people I couldn’t stand and a boss and bitch dream team that tried to get me fired at every turn, I earned enough to buy myself a new laptop. I ordered it off an online deal from a trustworthy source. Now, I have never been a strong believer in the great power that is the postal service and I’ve been wronged by them too many times to count, so why on earth would I ever be stupid enough to trust them with something so valuable that I had worked so hard to receive? Heaven only knows.

The day of the predicted delivery came, and I spent the day stuck at home and anxiously awaiting its arrival. And when we got antsy about the lack of technological presence, we checked my email to see that it had supposedly been delivered an hour before. Insert mad string of cuss words here. After another two hours, several furious phone calls to the shipping company, the accusation of stealing, a visit from an arrogant cop who basically told me to get over it, some angry pacing in the driveway, and a kindhearted delivery man rushing over during his free time and knocking on our neighbors doors until alas he found the missing property, I finally held my new computer in my hands. All was well.

Or so I thought. Remember that trustworthy source from which I bought my computer? Yeah, well they called the next morning saying in essence that, oops we sent you a computer that’s worth two hundred dollars less than the one you ordered which actually happens to be sold out now so would you like us to send you a fifty dollar rebate to make up for it?  As if that wasn’t a hundred and fifty dollars less than what I had been jipped out of. I was pissed. My father bargained with them, getting me another computer equal to the one I thought I had. But we had to buy that one too and then return the one I had to get our money back. Thank goodness for parents, because Lord knows I didn’t have the money to pay for a second computer.

Two weeks later I came into the possession of a laptop that was kind of similar to the one I had wanted. Yup. If you did the math for a timeline here, then you know that this excuse only accounts for the days until about August 29th. So why didn’t I make this post at anytime during the last month? I don’t have a good reason. Excusing school starting and a line up of classes that are going to be the death of me, as well as wrapping up my seasonal job and my recent inability to even think, there is absolutely no good reason for my absence. I forgot. I’m sorry.

So, I’m extending a hand, waving a white flag of surrender, and hoping for a peaceful return. I can’t promise that I will post everyday, but I will try to at least frequent more than once every three months. I want to do this. I do. But I fail at being a blogger. Heck, sometimes I think I fail at life, no matter how much one of my classmates labels me as over dramatic when I vocalized this thought the other day. I’m at a weird place in life right now. My mind isn’t functioning properly and my emotions are going haywire. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. None the less, I want to make this work. It’s not going to be easy, but I’m willing to try. Please forgive me. And if you have stuck around and read this after my absence, thank you. 🙂




Through My Eyes


Well that’s all for now guys, So until next time, Keep on Dreaming &*)