The worth of a book is to be measured by what you can carry away from it.  ~James Bryce

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I love reading; I’m sure that by now all you who have read my posts have figured that out. Today, somewhere between un-decorating my home, baking for the New-years, cleaning and packing up all of our Christmas ornaments (Notable only if you have ever tried to squeeze seventy-odd boxed Hallmark ornaments into on small plastic tote, without breaking them, you would now how utterly annoying and aggravating that process can be; I had to take all of them out at least three times,) I still managed to find the time to read. I finished two books today. And no not out of the five mentioned on a couple of posts ago; I did manage to get another trip to the bookstore, though I was utterly unsuccessfully in my attempts at weaseling a stop at Bath and body works too L.  But oh well, I did get five more books.

1.        Chasing Brooklyn by Lisa Schroeder (Hardback; read today)

2.       13 Little Blue Envelopes by Maureen Johnson (Hardback)

3.       Saving Grace by Katherine Spencer (Hardback; read today)

4.       Rebel Angels by Libba Bray (Paperback)

5.       The White Darkness by Geraldine McCaughrean (Hardback)

I swear, you don’t pick the books, they pick you.  Have you ever read a book where, once you finish it, you realize that within its pages was the answer to your latest problem? Maybe it’s the state of mind that you are in when you go to look for reading material, or maybe it’s just fate, whatever it is, some things are being made increasingly clear today as we draw closer to the hour of our new year, it is time for a revolution.

A few weeks ago, I began thinking of everything that I needed to accomplish in the year to come. I thought of a list of about fifteen and jotted each one on a separate sticky note before adhering them onto the wall above my bed, thinking that I could take each one down as I got the tasks accomplished. The next day after I had come home from school, all of them had fallen down (okay, so maybe they could improve the stickiness of those things just a tad) except for one; Have Fun.  Now me, being ticked off at my foiled plan, didn’t really bother to think about this, but after I had read those books, I was reminded of the note.

It’s funny how the one plan that stuck was also the most cliché. But none the less, it’s true. Looking back on this last year, I have never quite grasped that concept. I’ve pushed, planned, attempted to do new things, set now failed goals, and all around lived in the future; worrying over things to come and forgetting to take time to see the good things right in front of me. How many days have I spent unhappily thinking that MAYBE something bad Might happen? Or ruined a possible good time with friends regretting a moment in my past? Too many to count, that’s for sure.

I realized that the only way I can change anything in my life, is to be content with what’s happening now. Forget thinking about the future, and don’t spend every waking moment living in the past. We have no guarantees, anything and everything can and most likely will happen, and so what’s the use of planning for a future that will possibly never happen? Every year I make that list, more often than not including the same things, and looking back on those years, I hardly ever got to achieve those mind set goals. Sometimes planning gets in your way of actually doing anything. That’s not to say that I didn’t accomplish anything, but when you actually take time to look into your past, what is the stuff that you remember the most? Sure, there’s heartache, grievances and tragedy; but behind all of that darkness, the things that shine through are the special moments in your day to day life. Staying up all night talking with your best friend, playing a game that you have always loved, the memorable laughter of your group at lunch, the inside jokes, or a simple smile from someone you pass on the street; these are why we have reason to look back.

Then I got to thinking about all the things I missed out on because I was too embarrassed, or it wasn’t practical. When was the last time I had been on a swing? Way back in elementary school, that was one of my favorite activities, I stopped doing that as I grew, but why? Was it really that childish, or was I just worried about what others would think?  So it all comes down to this: Forget everyone else and have fun. Sure, I have tasks that I would like to accomplish in this year, but if it doesn’t happen, it’s not the end of the world. And who knows if missing out on those will lead me down a new, exciting and fun path.

Well that’s all for now, Happy New Year, and Keep on Dreaming. &*)

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